NO, YOU don't got it, GET it?

Sometimes, I wonder why some (most?) of Malaysians (that I’ve encountered) doesn’t understand really simple statements? Let’s see my typical daily examples:

Typical Example 1:

A: Can I have 3 blank CDs please?
Me: Sorry sir, we’re ran out of CD-Rs
A: Hah? Not even one left!?
Me: Yes sir, We’re out of CD-Rs

Typical Example 2:

A: Hi, I wanna print this document *hands me Pen Drive*
Me: Err. sorry, but we ran out of printing paper
A: Eh.. nononono, I just wanna print. I just arrived here, urgent documents!
Me: Uhm.. sir, we ran out of paper.
A: Noooo, you see, I just arrived here and I want to print this document. I need to submit it tomorrow!
Me: You want to print, right?
A: Yep.
Me: But you see, when you want to print, we need to have a paper. Else you don’t have anything to print on
A: *thinks*
Me: *looks at A*
A: Oh oh OH!! Im sorry sorry sorry! I was too blur!
Me: …

Typical Example 3:

B: Can I print this?
Me: We’re out of toner today Ma’am
B: So how?
Me: (… DUH!) Err. you can not print lah!
B: Aisey, but this is URGENT!
Me: Well, if your car is punctured in the highway, would it move if you tell it your trip is important? Not unless you change the tires, right?
B: Uhm.. yeah.. hihi.. nevermind then, thanks!

Typical Example 4:

C: Why’s the net so slow?
Me: There’s a lot of people surfing tonight sir, so I guess the bandwidth is compromized. Furthermore, alot of them are visiting MySpace :)
C: Hmm, can I change to PC03 then?
Me: Sure, but the net speed will be the same, as everybody is connected to one pipe anyways
C: Nevermind, just lemme change, will ya?
Me: Okay.
*10 mins later (no body left the premise)*
C: Hey why’s the net still slow?
Me: As I said, there’s no difference between any of the PCs, they’re all the same since they’re linked
C: Gah, I wanna change to PC22 !
Me: Roger, that.
*15 mins later (a few people left, but a few people comes in as well)*
C: God dammit! WHY IS IT STILL SLOW!!?
Me: (… Wtf? this dude for real?..) AS I SAID, there’s no difference!
C: I wanna change to PC10!
(You can guess what happened next, he left after two more changes)

Note that all the stories above really happened (yeah, even the ‘no paper’ guy… I don’t know what’s gotten into him). Malaysia, Boleh? Hell YES.

posted on Friday, February 17th, 2006 at 00:27 in Life & Work.

11 Comments

February 17, 2006 @ 10:00
JusT says:
*LAUGH OUT SO LOUD THAT THE SKY SHAKES*

hell yes bro.. i just wanted to put these shits on my blog…
miahhahah nice2.. yes, I can be the witness, that these shits really happened..
the world is full of weird people…

They haven’t met the “Perjanjian Sewaan” guy.. sheeeshh..
February 17, 2006 @ 11:58
Yuhi says:
Ahh..damn..that was..ROFL..

P/S: I’ll be borrowing a few of your blogposts as reference..can ah? *will be asking for the same thing til you say yes..XD*
February 18, 2006 @ 05:15
far far east says:
dude, seriously…cd kosong ade? just jokin!
February 20, 2006 @ 09:43
francine says:
ahhh the many many stories of shit headers. i’ve got one Ross…and this IS kisah benar. it happened when i was a hostess…somewhere many many many many months ago.

Me : Good evening sir, table for…?
Shit Head : Table for 2
Me : Smoking or non sir?
Shit Head : Non preferred but if there’s none, gimme a smoking one
Me : Ok sir, the waiting time is approximately 15 minutes
Shit Head : So ur saying i’ll get my table in 15 minutes?
Me : Approximately sir. If ur here in 15 minutes n if there’s no table, u still have to wait. Sorry sir.
Shit Head : Ok
(after 5 minutes…)
Shit Head : Is my table ready?
Me : Sorry sir, not yet
Shit Head : What??? Why so long one?? Puhleeeeze lar missy (eh eh ewah ewah ske ske die jek panggil aku missy) today’s my gurl’s birthday n i really need to dine here
Me : (at this point i’m thinking wow!! like Chili’s is the only place on earth she’s gotta dine) sorry sir, but we’re really full right now. and i did mention to u the waiting time is 15 minutes, APPROXIMATELY.
Shit Head : It’s already 15 minutes, i want my table now. Kasteme awayz rite one
Me : (fucking shit in hell, not in Chili’s ur alwayz rite nah ah) sir, it’s friday nite n it’s full houz. when it’s full we put u on the waiting list n as soon as it’s ur turn n there’s an available table, we will sit u. right now, there’s no available table n there’s 3 people waiting to be sitted before u.
Shit Head : If i give u 5 ringgit, will u sit me now?
Me : Sorry sir, i dun take bribes…certainly not 5 ringgit anyway.
Shit Head : How long more? i’m hungry, i got movie after this…(pointing to TGV)
Me : My co-host has already sitted 2 people, so there’s one more to go then u’ll get ur table sir.
Shit Head : But i waited already 30 minutes (huh??? aku kire-kire baru 10 minit mangkuk nie tunggu)
Me :Sir, sorry but this is our policy.
Shit Head : Aiya next time say me earlier ma…no need wait so long here for table. u say must wait i dowan lar. i will go to madam kwan’s.
Me : Thank u sir (still cube kontrol senyum, sib baik bukan bapak aku punye restoren)

The end…
Sorry ar Ross, citer panjang gile. Cheh makes me so pissed…which part did i not explain to him? n this happens almost everynite…GOD!!!!
February 20, 2006 @ 11:32
Fird says:
they seems to use the very same reason to be stupid “kasteme alwayz rite”

Stupid fucks.
February 20, 2006 @ 15:36
francine says:
yeah n fuck rulez their head… cheh!! shit headS!
February 21, 2006 @ 10:25
seaotter says:
aha….the “customer is always right” motto.

it is nice to follow the customer….when they ARE right and SENSIBLE. if unsensible..well….the door is over there? (IMHO, dont quote me on this)

and oh ross, your blogsome account masih ader ke? i need to re-change your link….again…:P XD
February 21, 2006 @ 11:01
Fird says:
Blogsome’s still there. I will be removing it soon though. Meanwhile, yeah, sorry you had to change the link.. AGAIN XD
February 22, 2006 @ 21:50
Edo says:
aha again… the “customer is always right” motto.

Hated those words, especially during the days when I work at Shakey’s.
February 22, 2006 @ 22:05
Fird says:
The “slogan” is way over-abused.

Most of the times when a customer said that, they are usually on the wrong and is trying to use the “saishuu-heiki” (ultimate weapon) against the merchant.

Fuck them, stupid weirdos.
February 26, 2006 @ 17:04
Just says:
YEAH YEAH! try to say this to that kinda customers

motherfucker:hey customer is always rite!!
me: my goodness! u are rite! but i dun see any customers here. all i see is one, stupid, big-ass, ugly, horny lil bitch trying to bitching his way to my cybercafe.. sorry, i dun take he-bitch as my customers..

and remember to SMILE!

Post Your Comment!

February 17, 2006 @ 10:00

JusT says:

*LAUGH OUT SO LOUD THAT THE SKY SHAKES*

hell yes bro.. i just wanted to put these shits on my blog…
miahhahah nice2.. yes, I can be the witness, that these shits really happened..
the world is full of weird people…

They haven’t met the “Perjanjian Sewaan” guy.. sheeeshh..

February 17, 2006 @ 11:58

Yuhi says:

Ahh..damn..that was..ROFL..

P/S: I’ll be borrowing a few of your blogposts as reference..can ah? *will be asking for the same thing til you say yes..XD*

February 18, 2006 @ 05:15

far far east says:

dude, seriously…cd kosong ade? just jokin!

February 20, 2006 @ 09:43

francine says:

ahhh the many many stories of shit headers. i’ve got one Ross…and this IS kisah benar. it happened when i was a hostess…somewhere many many many many months ago.

Me : Good evening sir, table for…?
Shit Head : Table for 2
Me : Smoking or non sir?
Shit Head : Non preferred but if there’s none, gimme a smoking one
Me : Ok sir, the waiting time is approximately 15 minutes
Shit Head : So ur saying i’ll get my table in 15 minutes?
Me : Approximately sir. If ur here in 15 minutes n if there’s no table, u still have to wait. Sorry sir.
Shit Head : Ok
(after 5 minutes…)
Shit Head : Is my table ready?
Me : Sorry sir, not yet
Shit Head : What??? Why so long one?? Puhleeeeze lar missy (eh eh ewah ewah ske ske die jek panggil aku missy) today’s my gurl’s birthday n i really need to dine here
Me : (at this point i’m thinking wow!! like Chili’s is the only place on earth she’s gotta dine) sorry sir, but we’re really full right now. and i did mention to u the waiting time is 15 minutes, APPROXIMATELY.
Shit Head : It’s already 15 minutes, i want my table now. Kasteme awayz rite one
Me : (fucking shit in hell, not in Chili’s ur alwayz rite nah ah) sir, it’s friday nite n it’s full houz. when it’s full we put u on the waiting list n as soon as it’s ur turn n there’s an available table, we will sit u. right now, there’s no available table n there’s 3 people waiting to be sitted before u.
Shit Head : If i give u 5 ringgit, will u sit me now?
Me : Sorry sir, i dun take bribes…certainly not 5 ringgit anyway.
Shit Head : How long more? i’m hungry, i got movie after this…(pointing to TGV)
Me : My co-host has already sitted 2 people, so there’s one more to go then u’ll get ur table sir.
Shit Head : But i waited already 30 minutes (huh??? aku kire-kire baru 10 minit mangkuk nie tunggu)
Me :Sir, sorry but this is our policy.
Shit Head : Aiya next time say me earlier ma…no need wait so long here for table. u say must wait i dowan lar. i will go to madam kwan’s.
Me : Thank u sir (still cube kontrol senyum, sib baik bukan bapak aku punye restoren)

The end…
Sorry ar Ross, citer panjang gile. Cheh makes me so pissed…which part did i not explain to him? n this happens almost everynite…GOD!!!!

February 20, 2006 @ 11:32

Fird says:

they seems to use the very same reason to be stupid “kasteme alwayz rite”

Stupid fucks.

February 20, 2006 @ 15:36

yeah n fuck rulez their head… cheh!! shit headS!

February 21, 2006 @ 10:25

seaotter says:

aha….the “customer is always right” motto.

it is nice to follow the customer….when they ARE right and SENSIBLE. if unsensible..well….the door is over there? (IMHO, dont quote me on this)

and oh ross, your blogsome account masih ader ke? i need to re-change your link….again…:P XD

February 21, 2006 @ 11:01

Blogsome’s still there. I will be removing it soon though. Meanwhile, yeah, sorry you had to change the link.. AGAIN XD

February 22, 2006 @ 21:50

Edo says:

aha again… the “customer is always right” motto.

Hated those words, especially during the days when I work at Shakey’s.

February 22, 2006 @ 22:05

The “slogan” is way over-abused.

Most of the times when a customer said that, they are usually on the wrong and is trying to use the “saishuu-heiki” (ultimate weapon) against the merchant.

Fuck them, stupid weirdos.

February 26, 2006 @ 17:04

Just says:

YEAH YEAH! try to say this to that kinda customers

motherfucker:hey customer is always rite!!
me: my goodness! u are rite! but i dun see any customers here. all i see is one, stupid, big-ass, ugly, horny lil bitch trying to bitching his way to my cybercafe.. sorry, i dun take he-bitch as my customers..

and remember to SMILE!

firdouss.com